I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Found your dick twin last night
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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