someone get that fucking seahorse.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
