He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
