I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Randomize