the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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