Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
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