Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
