Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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