my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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