dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Randomize
