he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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