Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
