I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Randomize
