I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
