dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
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