you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
my mouth tastes like poor choices
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
NoShamevember. You game?
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize