im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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