i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize