They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
