Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
