ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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