So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Randomize
