he shaved USA in his pubs
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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