hell yes lets make some ravioli
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize