How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
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