also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
