I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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