dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
