I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
