ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
