Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
And then my night got REAL pukey
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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