That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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