I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize