Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
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