Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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