My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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