David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
