I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
