Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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