so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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