even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Sorry my hands just texted you
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
My bed smells like the plague
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
