Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Randomize
