We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
A+ Viking dick
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Randomize
