some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
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