I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
