I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
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