More tranny stories later!
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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