i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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