i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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