absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
