we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
